


Cadet Kirk

by IvanW



Series: The Professor-Cadet [1]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Cadets, Domestic Violence, Fluff, Gay Sex, M/M, Professors, Sexual Content, Starfleet Academy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-29
Updated: 2014-08-18
Packaged: 2018-01-21 06:47:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1541492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IvanW/pseuds/IvanW
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spock is notified Cadet Kirk needs help from an abusive boyfriend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Carla_L](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Carla_L/gifts).



> For Carla and she knows why.

Spock had just completed grading the most recent assignment for his class when the Orion student, Gaila, came dashing in.

“Professor! Professor Spock” She stopped before him, out of breath.

“There’s no running in my classroom, Cadet.”

“I know, it’s just. It’s Cadet Kirk, Professor.”

Spock straightened, instantly alert. “What about him?”

“It’s his boyfriend, Professor. He’s beating the crap out of Jim.”

Spock hurried from his classroom, ignoring his own rule of no running. Out in the courtyard not far from the science building, Cadet Gary Mitchell stood over Cadet James Kirk who lay on the ground holding his left cheek. Spock felt himself fill with rage as his fists clenched.

He stalked up to Mitchell and grabbed him by the back of his collar. Mitchell howled in protest.

“What the hell?” Mitchell yelled.

Spock tossed him to the ground. “How does it feel?”

Cadet Kirk scrambled to his feet, backing away, his eyes wide.

For the moment, Spock ignored him and concentrated on Mitchell. “Consider yourself on report, Cadet. We do not tolerate this sort of behavior. Get up.”

Gary Mitchell got to his feet, shooting a glare at Cadet Kirk, before turning to face Spock. “This isn’t your business, Professor. This is between me and my boyfriend.”

“You are wrong. You made it my business. Furthermore, if you go anywhere near Cadet Kirk again I will see you expelled.”

“You-you can’t do that,” Mitchell protested.

Spock arched a brow at him. “I most definitely can and will. You are dismissed. Cadet Kirk, come with me.”

He waited for Mitchell to walk away in the opposite direction before he gestured for Jim Kirk to precede him into the science building.

When they entered his classroom, Spock went to his desk and opened a drawer. He pulled out a wipe and handed it to Cadet Kirk.

“Thanks,” Kirk mumbled. He wiped his face of dirt and blood. Spock noticed he was getting a black eye on the left side and that his cheek was bruised. He had a busted lip, too.

“How often does he hit you?” Spock asked quietly.

Kirk shifted and turned red. “Um, not that often, really. A couple of times. Never as bad as this.”

“I see. And what is the cause?”

Kirk shrugged. “This time? He thought I was flirting too much.”

“You should not accept this treatment.”

“I don’t. Not really. I just…I don’t know why I do. Guess I think maybe I deserve it.” Kirk was staring down at his shoes.

Spock stepped closer to him and touched his uninjured cheek with his fingertips. “He is not worthy of you.”

Kirk’s eyes rose, their intense blueness focusing on Spock. “Maybe I’m not worthy of him.”

“There are many here who would disagree.”

Cadet Kirk smiled a little. “Yeah? You think?”

Spock nodded. “I do. You attract a lot of attention, Cadet.”

“You think you could call me Jim?”

He inclined his head. “Jim.”

“I know it’s stupid to be with Gary. Just when I first got here he was my only friend. And he didn’t start doing stuff like that until later.” Jim sighed. “I’m an idiot for putting up with it.”

“I prefer you do not practice self-abasement. What is done is done. Do not go back to him, though.”

Jim shook his head. “No, I won’t. I’m done with him.”

“I hope that is true. Does your eye hurt?”

“A little,” Jim admitted. “He sucker punched me, the bastard.”

“I do not know anything about his parentage, however—”

Jim laughed. “No, I—um never mind. Thanks for that by the way. Coming to my rescue. I was still a little dazed.”

“Cadet Gaila told me you were in need of assistance,” Spock advised.

“Oh. Cool. Yeah, she is a friend.”

Spock nodded. “I believe she is enamored of you.”

“Gaila? Nah. She’s just a friend. And anyway, she knows I only like guys.”

For some reason that made Spock’s mouth go dry. “I am gratified she came to tell me you required assistance.”

“Me, too.” Jim smiled, which made his blue eyes sparkle, even with the damage done to the left one.

“Are you afraid Mitchell will still bother you?”

“He might.” Jim shrugged. “He’s kind of stupid. Thick skulled.”

Spock hesitated. He was not exactly accustomed to human ways, but he could not deny he was rather fascinated by Cadet Kirk.

“Would you like to accompany me to dinner?” Spock asked.

Jim blinked. “Tonight?”

“Or whenever you have no plans.”

“You offering to be my bodyguard?”

“I do not believe that will be required.”

The smile flashed again. “You’re asking me on a date?”

Spock swallowed. “If my intentions are unwelcome then I withdraw the invitation.”

But Jim was shaking his head. “No, no. Not unwelcome. Just a surprise.”

“Why a surprise?”

“You’re just—God, everyone just—” Jim laughed.

“I do not understand.”

Jim sighed. “You’re really hot and super cool, basically. I wouldn’t have thought someone like you would be interested in someone like me.”

Spock arched a brow. “What is wrong with you?”

“Well, nothing. I guess. I’m just…not really in your league.”

Spock shook his head. “Are you accepting my invitation or not?”

“It’s not against the rules for a cadet and a professor?”

“You are no longer in my class as of three days ago,” Spock reminded him. “You got the top grade if you will recall.”

“Oh, I recall,” Jim said with a grin. “And what about my appearance?”

“Your…appearance?”

“You won’t be embarrassed to be seen with my face all smashed?”

“I will not,” Spock assured him. “If you are concerned though, you may come to my apartment and I will cook for you.”

Jim made an odd whooping noise. “You cook? Oh, my God, I’m in love.”

Spock arched a brow. “Perhaps it would be wise to sample my cooking before your declaration.”

Jim laughed. “Okay, you’re totally right about that. And I accept. Very much.”

Spock nodded. “I am finished here now if you would care to accompany me. We could stop at the market to buy the supplies needed.”

“Sounds great,” Jim agreed.

Spock shut off his computer and gathered the rest of the papers he needed to grade and led Jim out of his classroom. Strange how his day had gone. He had not expected to be taking anyone home with him that night when he’d started his day.

“Hey, tomorrow wanna have dinner with my friend, Bones and his girlfriend, Carol?” Jim asked as they left the campus.

“Bones?”

“Yeah, he’s a doctor.”

“Perhaps we should first get through tonight before making other plans,” Spock suggested.

“Oh.” Jim licked his lips. “Yeah, you’re right. Sorry. Getting ahead of myself.”

Spock studied Jim’s profile and saw tension and sadness there that wasn’t there before. He did not like it. “Jim?”

“Yeah?”

“Yes, I will accompany you to dinner tomorrow with your friends.”

He was rewarded with another one of Jim’s smiles and Spock was glad.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so as you can see, I was inspired to write a second chapter of this. Will there be a third eventually? It is possible. Depending I suppose on if anyone wants to see more with these two.

“You going out with that hobgoblin again?”

“His name is Spock, Bones,” Jim said. “As well you know. And yes.” Jim studied himself in the mirror trying to decide if the blue in his shirt matched his eyes enough.

“How many is this?”

“Three. Well, four. I don’t really count the first one.”

“Didn’t he make you dinner the first time?”

Jim smiled. “Sure did. But you know things were still…awkward between us that day.”

Bones snorted. “Listen, kid, things were pretty awkward when you two had dinner with me and Carol.”

He shrugged. “Well, Spock is Vulcan so he’s a little different.”

Bones watched Jim for a moment. “What are you doing tonight anyway?”

“He’s making me dinner again.”

“He a good cook?”

“Not particularly. But it’s the third date if you know what I mean.”

“In other words you’re hoping to get lucky,” Bones said with a chuckle. “Well, I guess I won’t expect you back tonight.”

“I sure hope not.” Jim sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. “I should bring lube, right? He’s totally not the type to have lube.”

Bones nodded. “Bring it. Better safe than sorry.”

Jim went into the bathroom and grabbed the lube under the sink, then went back into the main room. “Wish me luck.”

“Do I have to?”

Jim laughed. “Nah.”

“Hey, kid. Be careful.”

“You think Spock’s gonna be another Gary?” Jim stared in surprise.

“No, no, I don’t. But you trust too easily. Especially when you really like someone. And I can tell you really like Spock. So just…be careful. Anything seems off you leave. You need me, I’m just a comm away.”

Jim hugged Bones. “You’re the best, you know that?”

“Go on and get out of here. And have fun.”

“Thanks.” He pulled on his pea coat and left.

Jim made his way across the campus and to the apartment building about half a block down from the academy where Spock lived. He rode up the elevator to the third floor and then knocked on Spock’s door.

The door opened in less than ten seconds and Spock stood there dressed in his professor blacks.

“Welcome, Jim, come in,” Spock said, stepping aside to allow him entry.

Immediately he could smell spices coming from the kitchen.

“Smells good.”

“Shall I take your coat?” Spock helped him out of his coat and then stopped and stared at Jim.

Jim smiled quizzically. “What?”

“That color is aesthetically pleasing with your eyes.” Spock’s cheeks turned slightly green.

“You like my eyes?”

“Yes.” He moved away with Jim’s coat and hung it up. “Come, dinner is ready. What would you like to drink?”

“What have you got?”

“I can replicate whatever you wish, Jim.”

“Okay, how about an ale then.”

Spock nodded and indicated Jim should sit at the dining table. A few minutes later, Spock returned with a glass of ale and what looked like soup and bread.

“Looks good,” Jim said with a smile.

Spock inclined his head as he took the seat next to Jim. “It is simple fare. Your day was acceptable?”

“Mostly.”

Spock’s dark eyes studied him. “What occurred that concerns you?”

“Well, nothing really.”

“Jim.”

He shrugged. “I just saw Gary today.”

“I will contact security,” Spock said immediately.

“No, it’s okay, Spock. He didn’t approach me. I just saw him from a distance. I just wondered if he would try to see me again but he didn’t.”

“Nevertheless, I will alert campus security should he decide to do so.”

Just talking to Spock about it made Jim feel instantly better. He wasn’t really afraid of Gary. He’d learned his lesson not to take that crap from anyone, but just knowing Spock was on his side made him feel a lot more at ease.

“How about yours? Your day was all right?” Jim asked, spooning some of the orange soup.

“Yes. My classes were productive.” Spock paused. “During the upcoming semester break, my plan is to go to Vulcan to visit my parents.”

“Oh.” Jim nodded. “That’s good.”

Really what he thought was that sucked. The break was in another week and would last for four weeks. Which meant just as he was starting to really get into seeing Spock, he’d be gone for a month. Jim suspected Spock might not even want to see him when he returned. Maybe this was Spock’s way of saying once the break started, anything between them was done. It wouldn’t be the first time Jim was easily dismissed.

To cover his unhappiness, he lifted the glass of ale to his lips.

“Do you have plans during the break?” Spock asked him.

Jim shrugged. “Not really. Probably hang around Bones and Carol like usual. Unless he goes back to Georgia. He hasn’t mentioned that though.”

“You are very close to Dr. McCoy.”

“Oh, sure. He’s a great friend. My best friend actually.”

Spock sipped his tea. “I hope that you consider me your friend, Jim.”

It took a moment for Jim to answer because for a few seconds his heart squeezed in his chest. Friend? So, Spock only thought of him as a friend? Was that what he was trying to say? Of course it was. Now that Jim thought of it in four dates they hadn’t even shared a kiss. And now he knew why. He felt like an idiot. Why would someone like Spock want him anyway?

Jim forced a smile. “Of course you’re my friend, Spock.”

Spock looked relieved to hear it and then after another moment of silence their discussion turned to studies and Starfleet matters.

****

After Jim helped Spock clean up the kitchen, he stretched and yawned.

“Well, I should probably get going,” he announced.

Spock arched a brow.

“What?”

“I had assumed based on the fact you brought lubricant with you, you wished to engage in sexual intercourse.”

Jim nearly swallowed his own tongue and he certainly knew he was a bright shade of red. “Wh-what?”

“In the pocket of your coat.” Spock blinked. “Or was that meant for another individual?”

“Huh? No. No. God. Definitely not. It was meant for you.” Jim clapped his hand over his mouth. Shook his head. “What I meant was—”

Before he could finish his sentence though, Spock was kissing him. His lips crushing over Jim’s with almost unbearable focus and intimacy.

Jim groaned and grabbed onto Spock’s black professor’s jacket. He opened his mouth just as Spock’s tongue invaded.

And then Spock broke the kiss and Jim whimpered.

“It is my suggestion that we move to my bedroom,” Spock said softly.

“Huh? Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Definitely.”

“Do not forget the lubricant, Jim,” Spock said over his shoulder as he headed toward his bedroom door.

Jim stared after him for a second feeling his pulse spike almost dangerously high.

 _Jesus. Spock was going to fuck him_.

He scrambled to his coat and pulled out the lube and hurried after the Vulcan before he changed his mind.

Spock had turned on a very low light and removed the bedspread from his bed. He reached a hand toward Jim and Jim placed his hand in Spock’s as Spock began to kiss him once more. He was so lost to Spock’s kisses he barely registered that they were now laying on the bed and Spock was inching his shirt up his stomach, exposing skin to Spock’s questing hands.

“Jim?” Spock said against Jim’s mouth.

“Mm?”

“It is time for the removal of our clothing.”

Jim fought back a laugh since Spock sounded so serious. But he nodded. “’Kay.”

Jim sat up and toed off his sneakers, then undid his jeans and shimmied out of them.

Spock was staring at him. “You do not wear underclothing?”

“Well, normally I do, yeah. But I sort of thought it would be faster not to tonight, you know, if we were gonna,” Jim said with a grin. Then he noticed Spock’s gaze had now focused on Jim’s erection and Jim licked his lips. “You, uh, gonna get naked, Spock?”

Spock nodded, his cheeks slightly green. “You are an attractive human.”

Jim grinned. “Yeah? Well, you’re a scorching hot Vulcan.” He pulled off his shirt and then lay back on the bed watching Spock carefully remove his uniform and then fold it neatly. Jim thought it was adorable.

When Spock joined him on the bed, now nude to Jim’s hungry gaze, Jim pulled Spock on top of him and kissed him somewhat desperately.

Spock had brought the lube with him to the bed so Jim was breathless with anticipation as Spock squirted some out. He clung to Spock when the Vulcan spread his cheeks and gently inserted two fingers into Jim.

Jim didn’t know why, but he asked, “Have you ever done this?”

“Once,” Spock murmured. “Hush. Now is our time.”

His fingers probed deeper and Jim gasped, “Spock!”

After a few more thrusts of his fingers, Spock slipped his digits out from Jim and then squirted out more lube. Jim watched as he coated his cock and then with his dark eyes intense, he lifted and spread Jim’s legs and pushed inside him.

Spock rode him fast and deep with a singular focus that had Jim’s eyes rolling back in his head as he clutched at first the sheets and then Spock. Finally he slipped one hand between their bodies and wrapped his fist around his own cock, stroking it roughly, desperate to push himself over the edge he was riding.

His body was on fire, electrified, nerve endings lit with an intensity he had not felt before.

“Spock, God, please,” he begged desperately as Spock thrust inside him, brushing across his prostate. Then his balls pulled tight and he was coming, shooting all over his fingers even as Spock was moving fast within him.

Spock came silently, his body tensing as he emptied into Jim. He collapsed heavy and warm against Jim and pulled Jim almost impossibly close.

After several moments of silent heavy breathing, Jim ventured to say, “Can I stay?”

“I would not want you to leave.”

He smiled. “Good. Cause I don’t think I can even move.”

Spock kissed his brow. “There is no need. Sleep, Jim.”

“Hmm mm.”

As he drifted off he thought he heard Spock say, “You are safe here.”


	3. Chapter 3

 Jim woke up alone and for a moment he forgot where he was. He sat up and rubbed his eyes, looking around the starkly furnished room.

Spock’s room.

He hadn’t noticed it the night before, because…well because, but now he saw that the sheets were black and seemed to be made of fine silk.

The apartment was quiet and he realized immediately Spock was nowhere in the apartment. He got out of bed and searched for his clothes, finding them folded on a chair by the dresser. He dressed quickly and then left the bedroom, looking for some sort of message from Spock as to his whereabouts but there were none.

Jim figured Spock must have gone to the academy or something, but it would have been nice to see some indication of that. Without Spock there, he felt odd being in Spock’s apartment, so he left to return to his dorm.

His room was empty which he had expected since he knew Bones had a few finals left before the break. Jim had finished all of his. He was still kind of sleepy so he went back to bed and didn’t wake up for another couple of hours.

By the time he got out of the shower, wearing only a towel, Bones was there but a check of his PADD revealed no messages from Spock.

“Hey Bones, how did your final go?” Jim asked, as he towel dried his hair.

“About what I expected, I guess.” Bones eyed him from his desk. “Judging by the marks on your neck I guess last night went the way you wanted it to.”

“Marks?” Jim looked in the mirror for the first time. He had several hickeys. “I didn’t even see those.”

Bones rose and eyed one of the marks closely. “He’s a biter apparently.”

Jim felt himself blush. “Anyway. Um. I did find something out last night.”

“What’s that?”

“He’s going to Vulcan during the break.”

Bones returned to his chair at his desk. “You going with him?”

“Me? Why would I?”

“I don’t know. You’re his boyfriend?”

Jim bit his lip. “I’m not sure about that. I mean we barely know each other, really. Certainly not well enough to spend a month with him and his family on Vulcan. It sucks though. Because we could have totally been getting to know each other during that time and now he’s not even going to be around.”

“True enough.”

“He didn’t even ask me anyway. He told me what he’s doing and then asked what I was doing.”

“What are you doing?” Bones asked.

“No idea. Probably just hanging around the city. You and Carol going somewhere?”

Bones looked uncomfortable for a moment. “Well, she did ask me to go with her to visit her parents. But if you’re going to be alone then—”

“No!” Jim interrupted. “Go, Bones. I totally don’t need you or anyone else to babysit me. I’ll be fine by myself.”

“But Gary—”

“Hasn’t bothered me since Spock told him to leave me alone. Stop being a mother hen and go with Carol.”

Bones opened his mouth to reply but there was a knock at the door. Bones got up and opened it. “Oh. Hello, Spock.”

“Doctor. May I come in?”

Bones stepped aside to allow Spock entry. Spock was dressed his black academy uniform.

Spock stared at Jim. “Why are you unclothed in front of the doctor?”

“What?” Jim asked. “I’m not.”

Spock’s brow rose. “You are wearing only a towel. I request that you go into the room and cover yourself.”

“It’s not like I haven’t seen it before,” Bones grumbled.

“I’m not sure that helped, Bones,” Jim said rather helplessly. “Okay, hang on.”

He grabbed his jeans off the bed and pulled them on and then a reached for a T-shirt.

“There,” Jim said, returning to the main room. “Happy?”

Spock inclined his head. “I came to inquire if you wanted to have lunch with me.”

“Oh. Sure. Let me get my shoes.” When Jim was ready he said goodbye to Bones and followed Spock out of the dorm.

“I checked first at my apartment but you had left,” Spock said.

“Well, yeah, didn’t figure you wanted me to stay there all day.” He had to hurry to keep up with Spock who always seemed to move at a rapid pace.

“I would not have minded.”

“So you have a break in your day?”

“Affirmative. I will be overseeing another final in three hours.”

Spock chose a small corner café with outdoor seating just a block from the academy.

After they were seated, Jim asked, “You all ready for your trip to Vulcan?”

“Yes. I booked my voyage on a shuttle that leaves Friday.”

Jim tried not to show his disappointment at that. It would only be a few days before Spock would leave. “That should be fun. Seeing your family I mean.”

“What do you and Dr. McCoy intend to do during the break?”

Jim shrugged. “Actually he’s not going to be around after all.”

“He is going to Georgia?”

“No. Carol’s visiting her parents and Bones is going to go with her.” Jim smiled. “No biggie.”

“What will you do?” Spock asked with the slightest of frowns. One of his almost frowns.

“I dunno. I’ll figure it out.”

“You do not wish to visit your own family during the break?” Spock asked.

Jim shook his head. “No.” And that was all he intended to say about that.

Spock fell silent and then the waiter came and took their order. They spoke of other things, mostly related to the next semester at the academy.

Spock paid for lunch and then Jim walked back to the academy with him.

“All right, Spock, I guess I’ll catch you later.” Jim forced a smile. “Thanks for lunch.”

“Jim.”

He had already turned away, so he turned back. “Yeah?”

“I would like to see you tonight if you are available.”

Jim figured he didn’t have much longer with Spock, so he should take the time he could get. “I’m available.”

Spock nodded. “My apartment at seven? I will order takeout.”

“Sounds good.”

Spock hesitated. “Jim, I am unable to invite you to accompany me to Vulcan.”

The smile fell from Jim’s face. “What? No. No. You think that’s what I want?”

“It is not that I would not want you there, but my parents would expect—”

“Spock, I don’t expect or want to go to Vulcan with you, okay?”

Spock blinked. “I have offended you and that was not my intention.”

Jim blew out a frustrated breath. “No. You haven’t. It’s just…I didn’t expect that you would. We barely know each other. I get that. I wouldn’t be so presumptuous to assume because we fucked once that we’re suddenly a forever couple.”

“I see.”

“I hope that you do. I like you, Spock. A lot. But I don’t push myself on anyone.” Jim sighed and turned around.

“Jim?”

This time he didn’t turn around. “Yes, Spock?”

“Are you still coming at seven?”

He smiled a little. “Yeah, I’ll be there.”

Jim had almost reached his dorm room when a tall, muscular body stepped in front of him. Jim backed up.

“Hi, Jimmy.”

“Gary, get out of my way.”

Gary smiled and grabbed both of Jim’s arms in a hard grip. “I need to talk to you, Jimmy.”

“I don’t think we have anything to talk about.”

“Oh, we definitely do. First I want to apologize for the other day,” Gary said. “You know I didn’t mean it, baby. I just get so jealous.”

“Gary, no. We’re not doing this again.”

“You think? I’m not that easy to get rid of. I heard you’re going to be alone during the break.”

Jim’s eyes widened. “How’d you know?”

Gary smirked. “I have my sources. It’s the perfect time for us to get reacquainted. I know I hurt you, but I’ll make it up to you. And don’t worry about what you’ve been doing this week. I forgive you.”

“What?”

“During the break, you’re gonna move your stuff out of your dorm and into my place. I don’t like Leonard McCoy. He’s a terrible influence on you.” Gary nodded. “You’ll see, Jimmy. It can be good between us. Like before. I know how you like it, baby. I know how to make you moan.”

Jim shook his head and pulled away from Gary. “No, Gary. I’m not going back to you. Not this time.”

Gary laughed. “Sure you’re all brave now while your stupid friends are still here. But you’re gonna beg me when they’re all gone. On your hands and knees like a good bitch.”

Jim felt his cheeks heat. “Get lost.”

“See you soon, baby.” Gary walked away.

Jim let out a breath. “I’m okay. It’s okay.”

“Jim,” a soft female voice said from behind him.

He stiffened and turned around to face Carol. “Hi.”

Her eyes were soft with sympathy.

“How much did you overhear?”

“Enough. You’re coming with Leonard and me,” Carol said.

Jim shook his head. “No. Carol, I’ll be fine. You guys are not taking me with you. I can handle Gary.”

“But Jim—”

“I’ll be fine. I promise. Okay?”

She nodded. “Very well. But you should tell Spock.”

“Um. Yeah. Okay. I will.”


	4. Chapter 4

Spock glanced at the clock on his wall which read seven-thirty. Of course he had been well aware of the time even before he had looked. Jim was already thirty minutes beyond their appointed time.

He had never been stood up before but he was beginning to believe he had been this time. He had sent a message fifteen minutes ago to Jim which had gone unanswered.

Perhaps it had been a mistake not to explain to Jim why he was reluctant to take him to Vulcan. It had seemed to hurt Jim’s feelings. He had not intended any offense to the human, but Spock was aware that humans often took offense where none was intended.

It was seven-forty five before Spock’s doorbell rang. He went to the door and peered out the peephole to confirm Jim was his visitor.

Opening the door, Spock was surprised by the immediate smell of liquor. “You are inebriated.”

“Yeah.” Jim stumbled inside. “Yeah. Nelibrated. That mean toximated?”

“Intoxicated.”

“Drunk.” Jim’s eyes were red and wet.

“Did something happen?”

“Yeah, something happened. I found out you’re a fucking lying cheating bastard,” Jim said. “God, I can’t believe it.”

Spock blinked. “Jim?”

“My friend, Gaila, she told me all about you. She spoke to Cadet Uhura.”

“Uhura?”

“Uhura told her you’re engaged to some Vulcan woman. Bonded or whatever. How come you didn’t tell me that? What are you doing with me, Spock?”

“Jim, it is not what you think.”

“Isn’t it? God, why do I always pick guys that are shits to me?” Jim shook his head. “I liked you, Spock. So much. And I thought…” Jim’s voice cracked. “I thought you liked me.”

“Jim—”

“Bones warned me to be careful and I wouldn’t listen because I thought you’d be different.” He let out a shaky breath. “I almost didn’t come here. I wasn’t going to. But I just had to see if it was true. Are you bonded to T’Pring?”

Spock could not lie. “Yes.”

Jim closed his eyes tightly, squeezing out a tear. “Okay.”

“I would explain.”

Jim’s eyes opened but he shook his head. “Forget it. I don’t want to hear it. Goodbye, Spock.”

Spock watched Jim turn and leave his apartment. He knew he should go after him, but he did not. He was bonded to T’Pring. He did not wish to be, but he was.

****

Jim sunk to the floor of the elevator and let himself cry. He’d had so much hope for Spock. It had felt right in a way Gary never had. Sure Spock had not been a warm and fuzzy sort of boyfriend, but Jim had felt safe. He’d felt respected. And he had even believed Spock felt affection for him, even if he didn’t express it the same way as humans. Sex with Spock had been amazing. And yet…he’d been wrong. So wrong.

Spock would never be his. Not really. And now he knew exactly why Spock couldn’t bring Jim to Vulcan to meet his parents or anyone. And Jim was sitting on the floor of an elevator crying like a heartbroken fool.

The doors opened onto the ground floor.

“Hey, mate, you okay?”

Jim looked up at some strange guy and girl holding hands looking at him like maybe he was crazy. Maybe he was.

He struggled to his feet. “Yeah. I’m fine.”

Jim brushed past them to leave the elevator and headed out the door, walking quickly toward his dorm.

Gary stepped out in front of him, smiling. Jim felt his stomach clench, and then role with queasiness.

“Hello, baby,” Gary said. “I’ve been looking for you.”

****

“You look sad tonight, Spock.”

Spock did not believe he looked any different than usual during his computer conversations with his mother on Vulcan, but he had no doubt she sensed his mood was not what it usually was.

“I am…experiencing unrest.”

“Something I can do?”

Spock hesitated. “I met someone in San Francisco, Mother.”

She smiled slightly. “Someone?”

“Yes. His name is James Kirk. I intended to mention him when I came to Vulcan at the end of the week.”

“He’s important?”

“Yes. But…I do not believe it matters anymore.”

“No?” she asked with a frown.

“He does not wish to see me again,” Spock admitted. His communicator beeped.

“Oh, Spock. I’m so sorry.”

The communicator beeped again. 

“Mother, I will contact you tomorrow. Someone is trying to reach me.”

“Of course, Spock. We’ll talk then.”

His mother’s image faded and Spock flipped open his communicator.

“Spock here.”

“Spock, it’s Leonard McCoy. It’s about Jim.”

“Doctor, Jim left here some time ago. I do not believe he wishes to—”

“Be quiet. I’m trying to tell you. Jim’s in the hospital. Gary Mitchell attacked him.”

Spock’s heart almost stopped. “Is he…”

“He’s in a coma. You’d better get here. If you want to.” The doctor disconnected and Spock moved fast. 


	5. Chapter 5

Spock made it to the Starfleet Hospital in five point three minutes. It was merely a block away from his apartment and across the campus. During those five point three minutes, Spock’s heart rate had increased ten beats per minute.

McCoy had messaged the location of Jim’s room, so Spock made his way to that floor. Standing outside of the room was Jim’s friend, the Orion, Gaila. Spock allowed himself one illogical moment of irritation for it had been her who had told Jim of Spock’s bond before he’d been allowed to explain himself.

As he approached the door to the room, however, Spock squashed the irritation, for logically, the fault was his alone. She glanced at him briefly, but looked away, and Spock suspected she might feel some misplaced guilt after all.

The door was open and Dr. McCoy stood by Jim’s bed. Spock stepped inside and did not hesitate to approach.

Jim’s head was wrapped in a bandage. One eye, black and blue with bruising, was swollen shut and above that eye was the remnants of a cut that had been repaired. His lips were split and cracked.

McCoy stared at Spock for a long time. “There was some swelling in his brain. Had to open him up. Had to shave his head there. He won’t be happy.”

Spock swallowed, trying to ignore the ache that seemed to start in his heart and spread throughout. “What are his injuries?” Spock forced himself to ask.

“Cuts, bruises, nothing that serious,” McCoy said. “Except his head. There was a witness that indicated Mitchell sucker punched him and that he fell to the ground and hit his head. Mitchell kicked him a few times after that but split when someone came.”

“And Mitchell? Has he been apprehended?”

McCoy shook his head. “No. Still out there.”

Spock turned his gaze from the doctor to Jim, lying so pale and broken. Without looking at McCoy, Spock lifted his fingers toward Jim’s face. “May I?”

“What are you going to do?”

“Nothing that will harm him, I assure you.” Without waiting for further comment from McCoy, Spock’s fingers touched Jim’s face but stopped short of touching his meld points. He did not need to. Spock inhaled sharply as he was hit with the force of Jim’s mind in torment. The pain was sharp, intense. The memory of Mitchell’s attack frightening.

Clenching his other fist, Spock allowed the rage to consume him, fill him with hatred for the one who had done this to his…t’hy’la.

Spock dropped his hand from Jim’s face. He stalked away from the bed.

“Where are you going?” McCoy demanded.

Spock did not turn around. “There is something I must take care of. I will be back. Do not let any harm come to him.”

“What the hell—” McCoy sputtered but Spock was not listening. He was moving through the doorway and passed the startled face of Gaila.

Spock was on the hunt.

****

_Eternal darkness._

_It would be so easy to succumb. To let it go on forever. To never come to the light again._

_But he could not. At the end of the long tunnel of terrifying darkness was a doorway bathed in light. Glowing with warmth, safety, love. He wanted that. So he kept walking, crawling to it even. Therein lay salvation, peace. All that he’d ever hoped for, ever desired with all that made up the core of his being._

_As he got nearer the lit door, a figure appeared in the doorway. Shadowed and indistinguishable, but not frightening. No, quite the opposite. Desirable, wanted, needed, loved. That figure was his for the taking. It belonged to him if he reached for it._

_He crawled for it, reaching…reaching. The figure came into view as he hand almost touched the doorway._

_He gasped. “Spock.”_

Jim blinked his eyes open, slowly, the lids feeling almost sticky with glue and heavy. His breath shuddered, his chest tightened and he gulped air.

Spock sat very close to him on the edge of the bed and Jim realized he was definitely in a bed. Spock’s chocolate eyes were almost unbearably intense in their focus on Jim.

“Where am I?” Jim asked, his voice sounding hoarse, unused to his own ears. “Why are you here?”

“I am where I belong, by your side, always. You are in the hospital. You have been in a coma for two days.”

Jim swallowed. “Water?”

Spock reached for a cup and Jim heard the rattle of ice. “Dr. McCoy left ice chips. He was called away on another emergency, but I have messaged him to advise you were waking.”

Jim sucked on the ice chip Spock carefully placed in his mouth. “Gary?”

Spock inclined his head. “Yes. But you do not need to concern yourself with that now.”

“God, it’s like he came out of nowhere. He must have followed me.”

“No doubt. But he will not harm you again. How do you feel?”

“Head hurts a little bit. Sore all over.”

Spock nodded. “I am certain that is to be expected. Jim, when you are better, we need to talk.”

“About?”

“Us. I wish to take you with me to Vulcan to meet my parents.”

Jim frowned. “But you said—”

“Everything has changed. And nothing has changed.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I know. I will clarify things as you get better, ashaya. All that you need to know now is that I will never leave your side again.”

Jim stared at Spock. “It was you.”

“Explain.”

“You pulled me out of the coma, didn't you?”

Spock seemed to hesitate but then he nodded. “Yes. I could not wait any longer. I wished you to wake.”

“Mind meld?”

“Yes. But not an ordinary one, Jim. It was a meld between a bonded pair.”

“A-a what?”

“A bonded pair. We share a bond.”

Jim shook his head. “How is that possible?”

“I wished to wait to explain.”

“You've already said some stuff. Didn't Uhura say you were bonded to a Vulcan woman?”

“That will be formally ended when we journey to Vulcan. I have already informed those who need to know including T’Pring. She is amenable as she has found someone else she wishes to bond with,” Spock said quietly. “Jim. I wished to discuss with them my growing affection for you during the break when I intended to visit Vulcan. I did not want to subject you to any unpleasantness should it become difficult.” Spock was now gripping Jim’s hand tightly.

“Why didn't you tell me all this yourself?”

“That was my error. I should have explained before. I believed I had time. I had not anticipated Cadet Uhura sharing this information with your friend.”

Jim frowned. “How did she even know?”

“At one time she wished to engage in a romantic relationship with me but I advised her of my bond.”

“So you told her but not me?”

Spock stroked his fingers along Jim’s and it felt so good, Jim swallowed heavily. “I was not compelled by her the way I was with you.”

“Oh.”

“But all that is moot because when I touched your mind when you were injured I discovered that we are t’hy’la.”

“I still don’t get it,” Jim admitted with a sigh.

“I know. I will explain in detail later. You must rest now.”

“I am tired. You’d think I’d be wide awake.”

“You had trauma. Rest, ashaya. I will be here.”

****

With his t’hy’la resting, Spock stepped out of the room just as the Orion woman, Gaila, was returning.

“How is he?” she asked.

“He has awakened, but he is resting now.”

“I want to see him.”

“He is not to be disturbed.”

“Who says?” she demanded.

“I suggest you get your hearing checked, Cadet, since it is quite clear it was I who spoke,” Spock said.

“Spock!” Dr. McCoy exclaimed as he turned the corner of the hospital corridor. He frowned briefly at Gaila and then turned to Spock. “They found Gary Mitchell.”

Gaila gasped. “I hope they arrested him.”

McCoy shook his head. “I should have said they found his body. Washed up on shore.”

“He’s dead?” Gaila asked, eyes wide.

“Yes and I say good riddance.” McCoy narrowed his eyes at Spock. “Know anything about that, Spock?”

“Doctor, as I am sure you are aware, Vulcans are pacifists,” Spock replied. “However, I cannot say I am sorry he will no longer be a threat to my mate.”

Gaila stared at him. “Your mate?”

McCoy sighed. “Okay, Spock, whatever you say. I’m going in to check on Jim.” He disappeared into Jim’s room.

Spock stepped around Gaila. “Good day, Cadet,” he said as he went in search of tea.   


	6. Chapter 6

“Really, you don’t have to help me get dressed, Spock,” Jim said as Spock held out Jim’s coat for him and Jim stuck his arms in the sleeves.

“It is no trouble.”

Jim nodded. “Still.” He sat back on the edge of the hospital bed. “Why am I so tired?”

“You had a brain injury, Jim. You are still recovering.”

“Without all my hair.” Jim rubbed the bald patch on his head.

“It will grow back, ashaya,” Spock assured him.

Jim glanced at Spock. “Are you sure I’m your…your t’hy’la or whatever?”

“Yes. You have felt it too.”

“I felt something,” Jim agreed. “Just…me? Soulmate material?”

“There are many things in the universe, Jim, that cannot be explained. I only know that we are t’hy’la. Our minds are one and together.”

“It’s still a lot of pressure, Spock. I’m no one special. And you-you’re a Vulcan.”

“You are a Vulcan’s mate. There is no need for pressure, Jim. I will expect no more than you are able to give me.”

“But meeting your parents and all that?”

“All will be well,” Spock assured him.

Jim sighed. “You make everything seem so easy.”

“I did not say it would be completely easy, but there is no cause for anxiety and alarm. I will be there with you.”

“I can go back to the dorm with Bones, you know,” Jim said then. Spock had already advised him that he wanted Jim to stay in his apartment until they departed for Vulcan, now delayed a week. “I don’t want to be any trouble.”

“I have already had your belongings moved to my apartment,” Spock replied. “And you are no trouble.”

“Are you sure?”

Spock stepped close to Jim and put the tips of his fingers on Jim’s cheek. Jim felt instantly calmer, more relaxed. “There is no need to be so concerned.”

Jim smiled when Spock kept his fingers on Jim’s cheek. “That’s nice.”

“The bond does have its advantages.”

“Is Gary really dead?”

:”You find this news distressing?”

Jim shrugged. “Not exactly. I mean I know he was a terrible person. It’s just for a long time I thought—”

“You were unworthy of anyone better than him.”

Jim met Spock’s very assessing gaze. “Yeah.”

“It was Mitchell who was unworthy of you, Jim. Someday you will realize your worth and the sum of all your qualities.”

Jim nodded and smiled. “Okay, I’m more than ready to get out of here.” He stood up and with Spock’s hand on his elbow they left his hospital bed.

When they got to Spock’s apartment, Spock had Jim sit in the living room while he prepared him tea.

“You really don’t have to make such a fuss, Spock,” Jim told him. “I’m really not that fragile.”

“It pleases me to care for you,” Spock replied, handing him the tea and then sitting on the couch beside Jim. “Jim?”

“Yeah?”

“I would like to further explain about my previous behavior.”

Jim nodded. “You mean not telling me about T’Pring?”

“Yes.” Spock exhaled slowly. “I realize it was a mistake. I had not anticipated Cadet Uhura would reveal my personal business.”

“Maybe she thought she was doing the right thing. I don’t know. And honestly, Spock, none of that really matters to me. I would have preferred to know about it from you though.”

“Acknowledged. I anticipated some difficulties on Vulcan with the desolation of the bond with T’Pring and had not wished to subject you to it. In hindsight, I should have advised you of my intent.”

“And now? With this t’hy’la bond you speak of that is no longer a concern?”

“Correct. Dissolving the bond with T’Pring is a formality. It should never have been in place since our bond would supersede it. Fortunately, T’Pring does not want me anymore than I want her.”

Jim yawned, suddenly feeling ridiculously tired. Spock rose and pulled him up from the couch.

“You will sleep now. Later when you wake I will order food for us.”

“But what about—”

“There will be plenty of time for copulation later,” Spock said, leading him into the bedroom.

“How’d you know that was what I was going to ask?”

“We are bonded, Jim.”

“That’s gonna be so weird,” Jim said, as Spock pushed him down on the bed.

****

Jim woke to the sound of a female voice and he instantly recognized it has his friend, Gaila. She appeared to be arguing with Spock. Jim sighed and rose from the bed.

“It’s all right, Spock. I’m awake now,” Jim said, coming out of the bedroom.

Spock narrowed his eyes at Gaila but pursed his lips. “Do you desire refreshment?”

“More tea would be nice, thanks.” Jim smiled at Gaila and told her to sit. “How are you, G?”

“Better now that your bodyguard let me in,” she declared. “I didn’t mean to wake you though.”

“It was probably time to get up anyway.”

“You look good. A little pale.”

“I feel pretty good. Can’t wait for my hair to grow back though.”

“You’re still adorable,” Gaila told him. She reached for Jim’s hands and grasped them. “Listen, I’ve been wanting to tell you how sorry I am.”

“For what?”

“The whole Spock thing.” She glanced toward the kitchen where Spock prepared tea. “I should have kept my mouth shut. I just…well I didn’t want you to get hurt by another guy.”

“I know, sweetie. It’s okay, really. Spock and I have worked it out.”

“Are you sure he’s okay?” Gaila whispered. “He’s kind of scary.”

Jim laughed. “Nah, he’s not. Not to me. He won’t hurt me.”

“You’re sure?”

Jim smiled toward the kitchen, catching Spock’s gaze. “I’m very sure.”

****

“How about now?” Jim asked Spock as they prepared for bed that night.

“Now?” Spock arched a brow.

“Copulation.” Jim grinned. “Which honestly, I never thought that would sound hot until I met you.”

“Dr. McCoy—”

“Said I could do normal things. And that’s gonna be so normal between us. If you want…you can ride me.”

Spock blinked. “Ride you?”

Jim’s grin became wider. “Yeah. You know I lay on the bed on my back, you straddle me, lower yourself down and—”

Spock growled and pounced on Jim, covering his body with his own. “I think I would rather be inside you.”

Jim licked his lips. “Well, far be it from me to stop you. Get the lube and let’s go.”

Spock’s brow arched up again. “In a moment. First I will kiss every inch of your body.”

Jim’s heart stuttered. “Every inch?”

Spock nodded, his dark eyes intense. “Every single inch.”

“Bring it on,” he whispered, not at all embarrassed by the hitch in his breath.


	7. Chapter 7

“You sure you know what you’re doing?” Bones asked him for the tenth time.

“Yes, Bones.”

Bones sighed. “Where is he anyway?”

“He’s coming,” Jim assured him. They were waiting at a restaurant for Spock to join him, Bones, Carol, and Gaila for a goodbye dinner before they all departed for their homes during the break. In the morning Jim and Spock would be leaving. “I have to warn you though.”

Bones scowled. “Warn me?”

“These social gatherings really aren’t his thing.”

“I noticed that the first time we had dinner with him.”

“What are you two whispering about down there?” Gaila asked from her seat at the other end of the table.

“Nothing,” Jim replied. Spock suddenly appeared at their table and Jim smiled in greeting. “There you are. Sit down.” He patted the seat beside him.

Spock took the seat beside him and touched his fingers to Jim’s.

“That’s really sweet, Mr. Spock,” Carol said. “What is it?”

“It is a gesture between bonded couples,” Spock replied.

“A kiss,” Jim said, winking.

“Oh, well it’s very lovely.” She shoved Bones’ shoulder when he snorted.

“It’s pretty hot on Vulcan,” Gaila said. “Will Jim be able to handle the heat and atmosphere?”

“He will receive medical aid,” Spock replied.

“That’s not exactly an answer.”

“Gaila!”

“Well, it isn’t.”

Spock merely arched his brow. “Jim is my priority. There is no reason to fear for his safety.”

Gaila snorted. “Yeah, well his last boyfriend would have claimed the same thing.”

“Oh geez.” Jim shook his head. “You know, really, I can defend myself.”

“You’re too trusting, Jimmy. A pair of dark Vulcany eyes flutter and you are putty.”

“I do not blame your friends for being cautious, Jim,” Spock said quietly. “They only have your welfare in mind for which I am grateful.”

Gaila smiled. “See, Jimmy. We’re just cautious.”

Jim rolled his eyes.

****

“I think that’s everything I need,” Jim declared as he picked up his packed bag.

Spock watched him. “You are anxious.”

“I’m about to meet your parents. I’ve never met anyone’s parents before.”

“They are looking forward to it.”

“It’s still a lot of pressure. Your dad’s a Vulcan for heaven’s sake.”

“I am Vulcan.”

“Yes, I know. But you have to love me because of the bond or whatever. They don’t.”

“They will not interfere with our bond, Jim.”

“Not the same thing as welcoming me with open arms, Spock. Parents don’t exactly fall all over themselves to approve of me.”

“Their approval is irrelevant.”

“I know you told me,” Jim said. “But it’s bullshit and we both know it.” He sighed and reached for Spock’s hand. “Let’s go. We don’t want to be late.”

They left Spock’s apartment and made their way to the commercial shuttles. The shuttle to Vulcan they had booked would leave at eleven.

It seemed oddly vacant when they reached the area and standing in front of the departure gate was a Starfleet officer.

“I’m afraid the shuttles aren’t taking off.”

Jim felt Spock’s confusion. “We have purchased transport.”

“I’m sure. But no shuttle is taking off, Commander Spock. Actually, I’m surprised you haven’t been contacted.”

“Contacted?”

“Vulcan has issued a distress signal.”

Spock went perfectly still. Then without another word, he turned and stalked away in the direction they’d come.

“Spock! Spock, wait!” Jim ran after him.

****

Spock studied a PADD he held in his hands. “I will be on board the Enterprise with Captain Pike. You will stay here,” he told Jim without looking up.

“Wait, what? Why?”

“You are a cadet. It is too dangerous for you.”

“It’s dangerous for everyone. I want to be on the Enterprise with you.”

Spock shook his head. “Impossible. You will remain here where you will be safe.”

“That’s not fair. Other cadets are going.”

“Nevertheless, you will stay.” Spock turned away from him then and walked away.

Jim gritted his teeth in frustration. Then he saw Bones heading toward the ship. “Bones! Bones, wait up.”

Bones stopped. “Hey kid, I gotta go. I’ve been assigned to help on the Enterprise.”

“I know. I want you to get me on that ship.”

“Are you out of your corn fed mind?”

“Come on, Bones. Spock is going to be on there. And it’s Vulcan that’s under attack. I have to be on there.”

Bones stared at him. Then he shook his head. “I’m gonna regret this. Come on.”


	8. Epilogue: Aftermath

“Ah, ah, ah!” Jim bolted upright gasping for air.

“Easy, easy, Jim. You’re okay. You’re okay.” Bones holding him, easing him down on to a bed.

Jim gasped for air again, his chest burning from the need to breathe. Bones stuck him in the neck with a hypospray and his lungs cleared, breathing became easier. He blinked up at the ceiling.

“Jesus.”

“Yeah,” Bones greed. “That was a bad one, kid.”

“Fuck. I thought I was over those.”

“Guess the whole Nero thing brought it back. Never knew someone coming out of a coma could have a panic attack.”

“How long?”

“Just a couple of days.” Bones sat on the edge of the biobed.

“Where am I?”

“San Francisco. Starfleet hospital.”

“Great. Again?”

“Well, you saved Earth, fought Nero, rescued Pike, and destroyed the red matter—”

“That wasn’t me.”

“What you forgot to tell us as you beamed back on board the Enterprise and we got away from that sick son of a bitch is you hit that thick skull of yours. You collapsed. You’ve been here ever since.”

“Great,” Jim said again. “I didn’t hit it. The Romulans did it for me. Help me sit up, will you? Staring at you from flat on the bed’s giving me a headache.”

Bones helped him and moved the position of the biobed. “That better?”

“Yeah.” He touched his skull. “You didn’t make me bald again, did you?”

“No, beautiful. Listen, Jim, the admiralty wants to see you.”

“Are they going to demote me? Wait, what’s less than cadet?” He laughed.

“No, genius. I think they’re giving you a commendation or something. Trust me, they are very impressed with you. Pike has been telling them how great you are.”

Jim smiled. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

Jim looked away for a second, and then back at Bones. “How’s the crew?”

“Great, thanks to you.”

“Spock?”

Bones hesitated then sighed. “I haven’t seen him, Jim.”

“So, he-he hasn’t come by?”

“No.” Bones’ eyes were sad, sympathetic, and that was the unkindest cut of all. “If it helps, Sarek has inquired after you.”

Jim nodded but didn’t reply.

“Jim—”

“Hey, you know, it’s okay, Bones. It’s pretty much what I expected. No big deal, all right? I always knew I wasn’t anyone’s forever bondmate or anything.” Jim shrugged. “I had to do what I could to be captain, like-like the other Spock said. But it fucked up me and Spock. I have to accept the consequences.”

Bones nodded slowly. “You need anything, you just tell me.”

Jim forced a smile. “Something to eat?”

“Coming right up.”

Bones turned to leave and Jim saw the older Spock standing in the doorway.

“Who are you?” Bones asked.

The old Vulcan inclined his head. “I am Spock.”

Bones glanced back at Jim. “This the old one you saw down on Delta Vega?”

Jim nodded.

Bones sighed. “I’ll be back in a minute. And you, don’t stress him out.”

Spock straightened. “I would never.”

The elder Spock came into the room and stood by Jim’s bed. “You are recovering.”

“Yeah. Romulans hit hard.” Jim bit his lip. “So, uh, what do I call you?”

“Whatever you are comfortable with, Jim. I am Spock. However, if it bothers you to have two Spocks around, you may call me Selek.”

Jim shook his head. “I don’t think I’m going to have to worry about that.”

“Why?”

He really didn’t want to talk about it, but he guessed he would have to. “Spock and I aren’t going to be together.”

“You are bonded. You told me yourself that the bond has already been discovered between the two of you.”

“I was wrong. The events of the last few days changed his mind. I haven’t seen Spock. I doubt I will.” Jim shrugged. “You should know he tried to strangle me.”

“Strangle you?”

Jim laughed without humor. “That compromising thing worked a little too well.”

“I see.” Spock pursed his lips. “That is unfortunate. Still—”

“Forget it. Whatever you had with your Jim, it’s not the way it is here. Too many differences in this universe.”

Spock was silent for a minute or two and then he stroked two fingers across the top of Jim’s hand. “I have to cut this visit short, t’hy’la. There is someone I must talk with.”

Jim frowned. “Okay. Will-will I see you again?”

Spock gave him a slight smile. “I believe you will indeed see Spock again.”

****

“Thanks for letting me out of here, finally,” Jim said when he heard Bones return to his hospital room. He’d just gotten dressed in jeans and a T-shirt. Tomorrow he would go in front of the admiralty and the academy. He slipped his feet into his tennis shoes and stood. “Bones, could you hand me my jacket?” He reached behind him.

“I am not the doctor.”

Jim froze, his breath stilling in his chest. He forced himself to turn around and face Spock. _His_ Spock. His former Spock, anyway. “Hey.”

Spock said nothing, just stared at him.

“So, uh, come to say goodbye?”

“Negative. I have come to offer my apologies.”

“Oh.” Jim nodded. “Yeah, okay. Sure, no hard feelings.”

Spock tilted his head. “I am sorry?”

“It’s okay, Spock. I knew it was a mistake. I don’t blame you.” Jim released a long held breath. “I’m sorry about your mom. More sorry than I can say, actually.” He studied his fingernails like they had the answer to the universe or something. “I really wanted to meet her, you know. I’d never met anyone’s mom before.” And if he continued on this way he’d be balling his eyes out in seconds, so he turned away.

“She would have loved you,” Spock said quietly.

“And-and Vulcan. I wish we could have saved it. Her.”

“It was not your fault. There was nothing you could have done to prevent it. I marooned you on Delta Vega due to anger, yes, which I am ashamed of.”

“Spock—”

“But at least you were safe there. Or I thought you would be. I had convinced myself of that.”

“You didn’t know it had giant Jim-eating monsters?”

Spock looked pained. “I did not. I offer my apologies for my inexcusable attack on you physically.”

Jim turned to face him once more, shaking his head. “I provoked you.”

“I swore I would keep you safe above all else. You have already suffered abuse at the hands of others. That it was me that harmed you…it is unforgivable.”

Jim walked around the bed until he was standing in front of Spock, close enough to touch. “Is that why you stayed away?”

Spock swallowed visibly. “To harm one’s t’hy’la—”

“Spock!” Jim grabbed Spock’s collar and pulled him forward, crushing their lips together. Instantly the bond that had been eerily quiet for days, since the destruction of Vulcan, burst to life, bright and vibrant.

Spock’s hands came up to Jim’s face, fingers fanning out over Jim’s cheeks. Jim clung to him, wrapping his arms tight around Spock’s waist. Spock was shaking.

“Hey. Hey.” Jim drew back. “What is it?”

“I thought I lost you, too.”

“No. No, you haven’t. Spock.” Jim didn’t know what to do for Spock because he was still shaking. He knew Spock liked skin contact, so he inched his fingers under Spock’s shirt and touched the bare skin there. Spock drew a shaky breath. “Better?”

“Yes.” Spock’s arm squeezed him. “My controls are weak with the destruction of Vulcan.”

“I know. I know. Anything you need, I’m here, okay?”

Spock nodded. “Taluhk nash-veh k'dular.” He held Jim impossibly close.

Jim wasn’t sure what that meant but it sounded good, so he kissed Spock again. “I’m here. I’m here.”

****

Jim looked around the bridge of the Enterprise, smiling slightly. This was his now. Captain of the Enterprise. Even he hadn’t imagined this when he’d been convinced to join Starfleet. That it was at the expense of so many lives would add to burdens he already carried, but Jim intended to make them all proud.

The turbolift opened and Spock appeared. “Permission to come aboard, Captain.”

Jim could barely contain his smile. “Permission granted.”

“As you have yet to select a first officer, respectfully, I would like to submit my candidacy. Should you desire, I can provide character references.”

“It would be my honor, Commander.”

Their eyes met, held. There was a slight upturn of Spock’s lips as he turned and walked to his science station.

_Spock?_

_T’hy’la?_

_This is going to be awesome, Professor._

_I sincerely hope so, Cadet._


End file.
